So there I was on my way home from the airport. I’d been away for three days at a conference. My mind was now wondering what sort of reception my wife would give me. Yeah, I know, usually it was all love and kisses, something I really looked forward to. But then usually I come home with a small gift for my wife, you know the small surprise they are always waiting for. But this time she was going to get a big surprise for this one was five feet eight inches tall, dark and built like a dream who went by the name of Malena Montero.
Every time I glanced at her sitting next to me in the car I got a prickly feeling up the back of my neck. Then I’d think of my wife and I’d get shivers up and down my spine … What was I going to tell her. I went over all the old ta les none seemed to fit. She certainly wasn’t my sister, maybe a cousin … no, she knew all my family, maybe a distant cousin from Europe, no, she wouldn’t fall for that. I couldn’t pass her off as an American at all since she couldn’t speak English. The truth I knew she wouldn’t believe because you see I didn’t tell her where the conference was being held, if I had she’d never have let me go.
What’s that you say? You’d like to know the truth, and maybe you could help. O.K. fella if you’re so good, here it is. Let’s see how you would get out of this one. The conference was held in Casablanca. Try to explain that away for a start; when your wife thinks you’ve been in Chicago. The girl? She became my property when I raised my hand at an auction in the Casbah and I’ve been stuck with her for the last forty eight hours. Sure take a look, some dish eh? That’s what I thought when I was out there, but what now?
What do I do, walk in and say to the wife "Hey darling look what I picked up in the super market on the way home, special this week only fifteen bucks." What’s that fella? You have the answer … you’ll give me the fifteen bucks and take her of my hands. No deal fella. But say how much will you offer for my wife?